I don't know why I keep letting my guard down. Allow myself enjoy you for awhile, then hurting from the knowledge that I was just one out of the few (or many?) you'd had. You clearly aren't into anything serious.. so why the deception?

Everything is temporary. Nothing is permanent. Except for the Word of God.

You are magnificent,
eternally wonderful, glorious
Jesus, no one ever will compare
to you, Jesus

Two weeks till the start of a new school term. With boldness, with His guidance, I shall step into a fresh academic year, seeking Him in every aspect of my life, involving Him in my every decision. At least that's what I wish to do, and it shall become reality.

I will treasure relationships (friendships) more, because they can be so fragile, as I have learnt this summer. One wrong move, one wrong misinterpretation, and things could go awfully wrong, no matter the perceived strength of the relationship. It takes effort to patch things up. Of course it does... and this I have failed to do.

Other than this, well, I will be extra wary of where and who I invest my time, trust and hopes in. I really hate the feeling of falling hard and the experience of pain from that fall.

We cry 'Holy, holy, holy God'

It's late and I should be sleeping but this is something I simply cannot not blog.

Today's prayer concert (or rather, yesterday's) was simply indescribable.

I went to church, not expecting much, but was given much much more than what my tiny heart could contain. I was distracted from the start.. thinking about stuff, about whether Cheryl was gonna appear beside me since I had seats reserved (she didn't in the end haha). Those thoughts vanished when Pastor Beow Chin came up and made the congregation read verses from Matthew 11. The verses that said, Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest .... That slowly started to sink in, and I realised I had been too preoccupied with PFOC, the registrations, emails, payments etc, and I had grown very weary. I was (still am a little) constantly worrying about how the camp will turn out, whether the GLs had emailed or SMSed their freshmen, whether the programmes would turn out okay.. There was just too much that had been on my mind. 

And there, God offered rest. Just when I needed it. 

What was most amazing wasn't just this. It was when Pst Beow Chin did something (I think) nobody would have expected, us being in a brethren church. She said she was going to speak in tongues, and one or more of us from the congregation were going to interpret it. I didn't really know what to expect, until she spoke again in a tongue not understood by us but certainly left an impact on us. I don't know if it was the way she spoke, or the mysteriousness of it all, but I certainly felt a change in the atmosphere. 

People who went up mostly said how God was opening His arms to embrace us, to love us, ... But I felt His holiness in a way that I had never experienced before. I could only stand there, rooted, in awe of His purity and reverence, which just led to weeping. Of course I wasn't the only one who was weeping there.. God's presence was so tangible then, it made me want to go worshiping Him, in proclamation that God's name is holy. 

I didn't go for this year's church camp, but I felt that the encounter at this prayer concert had somehow made up for it. And there's going to be more of such encounters, as I feel that God is going to move in mightier ways in LSBC and in the community. 

Our God is truly an awesome God.