i haven't even wake up from dreamland and the visitors from the other side are already knocking vigorously at my door. haha. it's ok if it's not understood. not meant for anyone to understand anyway.
who said anything about hating anyone?
who said anything about trusting people i got to know for even less than a year? am i that naive? to tell every single detail? i know where to draw my line. my brain cells are still working.
who said anything about pride?
who said anything about crushes? i used to have a crush on 'dad'. no one at the moment. focusing on God, studies, piano and bass now...
who said anything about me being unable to accept differences?
who said that i'm totally shut off from comments?
who said that i hate the people who made comments if they're meant for me to improve and be alerted about things which i'm unaware of?
who said that after not very nice comments, friends become enemies?
who said that, if i don't respond to something, i have not thought about it? i'm just lost... and i'm not sure how to reply, how to gather my thoughts... i needed time to react and put them down in words.. you can't expect me to give you an instant reply right.
who said that i don't reflect? in fact i reflect too much... which comes to this conclusion:
i know you care. i appreciate that, really.. but it sounded really harsh this morning. i wasn't mentally prepared...
assumptions. assume not, for what you assume is not 100% right all the time.
i choose the people i trust, yes. now i'm announcing to the world, PUBLIC (another point: don't assume things before i open my mouth) this is the first time i'm putting this type of thing up for the world to see.
-God, my Daddy never lets me down. He's always there for me. i cry out to Him and he never fails to answer. sometimes i don't even need to express feelings out cause He already knows. He is the first One i turn to, He is the One and Only... nobody can replace Him.
-my trusted mentor is older and wiser, she knows alot and can give good advice. her shoulder has been available for me to cry on since 2003. i know i can trust her. (lunching with her soon, i can't wait)
-parents? well i'm not too sure about that. my life is still quite restricted,they only allow me to make friends from school and church.
-(my 'dad' has been gone for good. he's kinda out of my list)
-friends. a very wide range indeed, so exactly who? it's really quite simple. requirements: i completely trust those who are close, whom i know for at least a year, who are not mixing around with the wrong crowd and are not bad influences. i trust those who are ok-close, whom i know for at least 1/2 a year. note the word 'completely' is absent here. (Hillary and Joanne are different, though.) want to gain my trust, not that easy you know...
does that answer questions?? everything is summarised in this post and mainly the lines in red.
oh yeah, have i mentioned? i don't hate anyone currently. i'm not that selfish and i'm happy for those who are sure of what they want to do in the future so please don't assume.
be blessed, peeps... =)
meanwhile, i'll continue to listen carefully to morning devotions. those this week are having an impact on me.
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