Kept trying, trying, trying, was so confident that I would get it, but no I NEVER do. It's this kind of frustration that makes me want to give up once and for all, intensifies my inferiority complex (yes I know I have it), and makes me want to do more stupid things like in my previous post to try and forget it all, push it all away, pretend this never had to happen. It's times like this that I feel I simply am not good enough, and will never be good enough.
And I yearn to go back to where I can be accepted and 'loved,' even if only for awhile. Though I know that after the whole episode I'll have to face this shit again.
Take this away from me. Please. It's agonising.
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